Pairing: Thor/Loki, Peter/Harry, implied Tony/Bruce
Summary: Loki puts everyone in a skimpy minidress. Thor approves, Peter doesn’t. Tony tries to unsuccessfully seduce Peter but someone else does.
A/N:Written for this prompt on avengerkink and this prompt on spiderkink. It's spell-checked so I hope it won't be too bad.
“I don’t know who had the idea to change costumes but I approve. A lot”, Tony said when Peter stormed into the Stark Tower living room in high heels and a skimpy dress.
A very skimpy dress.
He promptly hit Tony.
“Ow, what was that for?” Tony protested.
“The first one is for leering at me and the second one is for sending Thor for back-up when I clearly said that was I was fighting Loki.” Peter yelled.
“What’s the problem with Thor?” Steve asked. He was blushing and not looking at Peter directly but rather in the opposite direction. “He fought against Loki before.”
“The problem is that Thor finds his brother irresistible when he’s in a dress. Putting everyone within a miles’ radius in hooker clothes should not be rewarded with raucous, incestuous sex in the middle of the street.”
“Clearly you have the wrong mindset here”, Tony said, his voice dropping seductively. “You should see the dress as an opportunity to get laid just like your teammate did. I for one find dresses-“
Peter hit him again and stormed off, nearly knocking over Bruce who was holding onto a piece of cloth that didn’t look like it would fit him and much less the Hulk.
“Hi Bruce”, Tony said with a slow smile spreading over his face.
“Oh, hey Pete, I didn’t think you’d be home this-“ Harry stopped when turned around to see Peter still in his dress but already out of the high heels.
“I just escaped Tony propositioning me”, Peter moaned and sat down at the kitchen table before slumping over. “Why is this my life?”
“Because you decided that getting bitten by a genetically engineered spider and developing superpowers was the universe telling you something? Not mention battling my father and saving me from the dark side.”
“I’m burning your Star Wars DVD’s”, Peter muttered into the table.
“They’re half MJ’s. You wouldn’t do that to her”, Harry reminded him.
“I’ve seen my teammate making out with his brother. I could plead temporary insanity.”
“If you think she would let you live long enough to plead”, Harry grinned and shrugged. “Do you want dinner now or do you want to get dressed first?” After he had nearly burned down the flat while trying to make toast, Harry had banned Peter from the kitchen for anything more complicated than switching the coffee machine on.
“I’m getting dressed first. And then I need to find some brain bleach and scrub my mind.” Peter grumbled, getting up.
“You know I can see why Tony would proposition you. The dress looks quite nice on you.”
Peter blinked. “You think I look nice?”
Harry’s shrug was nonchalant but with an edge of self-consciousness.
“And if I wasn’t wearing the dress would you still think I looked nice?”
“I know I do”, Harry wasn’t looking at him but instead staring at the wall. “I didn’t mean to come out like this.”
“As gay or as attracted to me?”
“But you and MJ-“
“Come on, Pete. When do you think I started being honest with myself?”
“So, do you think I look better in a dress or out of it?” Peter asked to lighten the mood.
“Are flirting with me, Peter Parker?” Harry pretended to be scandalised.
“Does it work?”
“You don’t have to do this.”
“I know, I’m not Tony. I think it’s compulsory for him.” That earned him a short-lived grin from Harry.
“You’re not gay, Pete.”
“See, there’s where bisexuality comes in. We’re sort of very open-minded when it comes to the gender of our potential partner.” Peter kept his light voice if only not to betray that his heart was pounding in his chest.
“Still doesn’t explain why you’re flirting with me”; and there was the emotion that Peter hated: insecurity. If he could Peter would resurrect Norman Osborne and hand him over to Loki. Because Loki, tendency to troll people aside, hated abusive parents with a passion.
“Have you looked in a mirror lately?” Peter asked back.
Harry rolled his eyes at him and looked down, clearly not believing him. “If you wanted someone good looking you could just gone with Tony St-“Peter kissed him mostly to shut him up but also to get his point across.
“Want to see how good I look out of this dress?” Peter asked, giving Harry a look from under his eyelashes.
Harry swallowed. “If this is a dream, don’t wake me okay?”
“You’ve been dreaming about me?” Peter asked with a seductive smile. “How about you…show me what happens in those dreams of yours?”
“Pete – “Harry started but Peter kissed him again.
“I’d thank Loki for this”, Peter said conversationally as he pulled Harry towards the bedroom, “but I’m sure he got his happy ending already.”